How Are You Going?

July 12, 2022•2 min read

How are you going?

My mind whispers, ‘How are you going?’, and I immediately respond – ‘GOOD’.

‘How are you going?’, ‘Good.’

The voice in my head gets louder. ‘How are you REALLY going?’

My surface dweller thinks I am good, the relationship is good, family is good, life is good, and that is true. However, my surface dweller never checks in to see my feelings.

I suppose it is a big question, as my feelings can change from minute to minute, and they are not a thought process. They are experiential, and they show up in my body sensations.

In contrast, my questioning thoughts are the voice in my head, full of ideas, opinions, beliefs, and perspectives, but they are never a feeling.

These thoughts move quickly and answer questions before I know how I feel.

I want to answer these questions, not just with part of myself but with the combined intelligence of my mind, heart, body, and soul. I want to respond with a complete version of myself.

I have found that the only way to access my collective intelligence is to move into a state of awareness where my mind becomes quiet, and I can access my feelings and instincts. In this state, I become the observer of my inner and outer environments. I am present with the unfolding moment, and I can welcome my discomforts, challenges, resistances, and emotions without hiding, diluting, avoiding, fixing, numbing, or pretending they don’t exist.

What I need to do first is PAUSE, which gives me space to see the situation clearly and to respond instead of automatically responding based on repetitive patterns.

What I do is I intentionally take a few deliberate breaths and notice the breath as it naturally flows in and out. I then scan my body and release any obvious tension, especially in the jaw. Then, I turn the corners of my mouth up with a soft smile, and I notice what emerges – and I do this with loving kindness. Then I know how I am going.

A simple pause connects our outer world with our inner world.

So, I ask, how are you going?

Vida

Vida Carlino is a transformational coach, guide, speaker, and space holder who helps women reshape their lives with clarity, achieve their audacious dreams and goals while consciously shaping a future that resonates with purpose, values and passion. Vida blends ancient wisdom practices, mindfulness and contemporary tools to guide women through life’s transitions and back to their most authentic, inspirational self Feeling stirred? Explore more at myvida.au or join a sacred circle.

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