Acceptable Addiction

I have been listening to the same story from different people in different professions living very different lives.

One story goes something like this…

My life is so busy, I don’t know who I am, what I want or why I am in this situation. I have little time to spend with family and friends and absolutely no time to cook a healthy meal never mind do yoga, meditation or smell the roses. The truth is I am too tired for that stuff.

And another one…

I am on the go 24/7 I get up early, work out, eat healthy, excel at my job look after my loved ones and that is perfect because I have a plan and when it comes together I will take time for me.

The story is different, but the message is the same.

Busy, busy, busy…

It appears that busyness has become a badge of honour to wear with pride, as if being busy means you are significant, important, worthy, a somebody.


If this is the case the opposite is equally valid. If you are not busy then you are not significant, important, worthy or a somebody.

Could this be why so many people are stressed out and busy?

I think of this “over busyness” as an addiction, like any other substance addiction. It covers up and hides what is happening underneath and for a while it works, until cracks start to appear and things leak out. Suppressed thoughts, feelings and emotions sneak out and say hello, usually at the most inappropriate times.

The leakages may carry a denied truth in the form of an unhealthy body, depression, a failing relationship, business challenges, dissatisfaction with career, financial insecurity, loneliness, fear, boredom or confusion.

The leaks are uncomfortable because they are incongruent with the significance and importance of busyness. They have a different message. Their message is all about the things that aren’t working as well as you may like.

How might it be if you where willing to welcome the leaks and all the truth they brought forth?

Sure, it might be a bit tough at first. Getting to know how you tick and what is important for your happiness, success and fulfilment can make you feel vulnerable and in many cultures vulnerability has been perceived as a weakness rather than a gateway to change.

Bene Brown says vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity   and change and she knows a lot about vulnerability.

Each leak brings with it an opportunity to learn, grow and understand who you are, what you value and why you do what you do.

I am not saying never be busy. It is human nature to do stuff, get things done, achieve, enjoy and celebrate our wins. It makes us feel great.

Being busy without stress and tension is exciting and creative. However, the fixation with continuously being busy hides the truth like an addiction and after a while it falls apart.

When I notice I have moved into continuous busyness I like to pause, reflect and ask myself:

What is the busyness really hiding?

Is this busyness making me happy or unhappy?

Is this busyness creating the life I choose?

The answers to these questions have given me some extraordinary insights, one as simple as “achieving my soul purpose includes owning the leaks.”

Ask yourself the questions you may be surprised by what you discover!